School Days

So school days have begun in our household and I don't know who they affect more - Me or Mikey. Let me explain.....

Tuesday: Day 1
We get up, watch some wiggles, then start getting ready for school. Granny is here to help us which is great. And Mikey is super excited. If you said - "Are you going to school today?" the response would be a dancing 20 month old saying "yeah, yeah, yeah!" He walked into school like a champ, like he owned the place. Walked right into the classroom and started playing - even gave everyone kisses goodbye! I on the other hand broke down as soon as I was outside school doors. I kept thinking - I'm leaving him and he doesn't understand why.

The next 4 hours were the longest of my life. I constantly looked at the clock to see if it was time to pick him up yet. Wasn't this supposed to be a break for me? Instead it turned into an anxiety marathon. :) 12:30 came and off to get him -- I immediatley knew the cry when I walked in the front door. :( I rushed to his classroom and there he is crying his little heart out -- why -- because Mommy didn't pack a pacifier in his bag and everyone else in class had one. BAD MOMMY!!!!! Think to self - if he's like this everytime I pick him up, I can't do it!

Thursday: Day 2
Same routine, get up, watch TV, get ready - only granny's not here this time. Again I get an excited answer when I ask if he's ready for school - ahhhhh, that's relief. Get to school - again walks in like a champ, only this time gripping my finger tightly. We drop off his lunch box and diaper bag in his cubby, then it's time for Mommy to go and I get the hand up and the "OOooooo" - which in Mikey language is "Noooooooooo". My heart starts to break and my instinct is to pick him up and just take him home with me. Instead I take him into the classroom and start playing with him until he is preoccupied - then JET out of there.

Again the next 4 hours are anxiety stricken. I even call the teacher to check on him, she tells me there have been no tears at all and that he is playing with the other kids. (Is this the same response all parents get, regardless of how their child is doing?) A little sigh of relief - but not a big one. It's 12 - I'm heading there early today. We walk in, no crying, good sign. Then I remember I left a statement in the car that I have to talk to the office about - I go out to get it, meanwhile Granny, who's with us, heads in. By the time I get back in I hear it -- the dreaded cry that I know so well. Granny is holding him and he's crying his heart out again - then he sees me and the cry gets harder. OMG - my little man is so heartbroken! The teacher say that a lot of kids do this - they are fine one minute, then see their mom or dad and immediately start crying. How horrible -- I didn't think it was going to be SO VERY HARD!

I always thought school would be hard on the student - never did I imagine that it would be this tough on the parent!